Dear, sweet person who landed here by googling “Do toddlers lick windows,” I do not know what, specifically, you were hoping to find, but let me end your anxious wonderings right now. Yes. Yes, toddlers do lick windows. And mirrors, walls, dogs, other toddlers, rocks, and insects. Also Kleenex, but they’re not likely to try that more than once or twice. Oh, and their brother’s arm cast. They might lick that.

Now, if you’re freaked out by the idea of toddlers licking things, let me reassure you: some toddlers will lick nothing at all. Including actual food items. It’s kind of a trade-off.

But on the plus side, licking weird-but-not-dangerous stuff is not likely to cause lasting harm, and does not indicate that the child is bound for a life-long career as an ice cream taste-tester. They’ll grow out of it, is what I’m saying. You don’t know many adults who go around licking lampposts and door frames, do you?

It’s a rhetorical question. You don’t have to answer that one. Really.

(Also? Thanks for not googling “lazy mom.” I appreciate that.)