ME to DANE: Would you get me a box of tissue? Or is it rude of me to ask that since you’re sitting down? I mean, I’m sitting down too, and you’re closer to the tissue, but you’re sitting on the floor, which is harder to get up from, and I’m sitting on the couch, which is easier to get up from, but I have a laptop and you don’t, even though you’re wrapping presents?

DANE: Yes.

[Staring contest ensues.]

DANE: I’ll get it, I just wondered if you remembered what the original question was after all that.

In fact, I did not.

But I suggest that it’s too much to ask that I remember the form of my original question when I’m already feeling slightly crummy and need tissue and have spent all my energy listing all possible tissue-getting factors.

Who’s with me?

(Okay, who can even follow what I’m saying? I swear I haven’t had any cold medicine, unless you count supplemental garlic and vitamin C and beta-glucan-whatever-it’s-called. It’s just the cold itself making me loopy. I’ll make sense another day.)