Just so you know: If you get in a car full of kids when you have lost your voice, it will take them approximately 38 seconds to forget that you can’t speak aloud.

I understand that the car is one of those prime locations for asking important informational and/or existential questions. (“What does a honeycomb look like? Why is it called a comb?” “Is there grass in heaven?” “Where are we going?” “Are we there yet? How about now? Okay, NOW?”)

However. If I cannot speak, then I cannot speak. Not even to answer really good questions. No, I am not ignoring you. And when I whisper-shout in an attempt to calm you down (because you think either I’m ignoring you or maybe my soul was abducted by aliens while my body continues to soundlessly drive home), I hurt my throat, and you still can’t hear me way back there in the third row of the minivan.

So what I’m saying is, I’m done with the driving until I have restored vocal abilities. Home is nice.