Amusing moments to look forward to, should a tree ever fall over on your car. Bonus points if the tree isn’t yours and the tree-responsible party is refusing to cover damages, because that’s funny, right?

- Your six-year-old’s response to being told the tree had fallen in the night: “Thank goodness! I’ve been praying for a new car, and you kept saying this one was working just fine!” (Note to parents: Give the child what she wants. Do not make her resort to divine intervention.)

- The number of neighbors you’ve never seen before who stop by to tell you mournfully how “it was such a beautiful car.” (Um, people? It was just a camry. That’s all.)

- The relief with which relatives, friends, and acquaintances will declare that “now you can get a minivan!” (And here I was kind of thrilled that we could fit three car seats in the backseat of a sedan. Eh, what do I know.)

- The teenage girl you’ve never seen before who will stand on your lawn and take pictures of the car because “This is the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to me!” (Wha-huh? Who are you?)

- The fact that a tree falling on the car will not set off the alarm. What does it take to set off the friggin’ car alarm? (Answer: A troupe of guys with chainsaws cutting the tree off the car. Of course, you won’t be able to get close enough to turn the car alarm OFF at that point.)

- Speaking of the troupe of chainsawers: They will arrive in the pouring rain three days after the tree falls, because they couldn’t be bothered to show up over a holiday weekend. Don’t worry about their rain-induced discomfort, though; every time the rain lets up, they will dry each other off with a gas-powered leaf blower.

And that’s all I got. If that’s not enough entertainment for you, well, I suggest you not park your car under root-less trees. Just a thought.